hmmm poetic greg

Now that the dust has gone
And the sky is clear once again
The path ahead splits to 2
Whatever direction I take seems unwise
Noone to guide me
Noone that can
Cause this is the course I chose to take
The only one that is left
Misery I seek not
Despair I want not
Waiting for life to turn full circle is all I want
Tell me Lord which path is right
This ain't time to run away
This ain't time to hide away
With vigor I will choose my way
Til death do I part
My friends I bid you guys farewell

Purity of tradition

I knew Uncle Greg hasn't been feeling too well. He feeling the aches and pains of school and he knows himself that he ought to be happy but he ain't happy. I think I am in an identity crisis. ( well I have through too many of these crap the last couple of months) Thanks Sheena anyways for the comforting yesterday. But I got to find Greg my way and on my terms. I got to be like the 84-85 Celtics.(I think!!) I got to put my heart on my sleeve. I got to play with the passion of the underdog and purity of tradition. I got to find the never quit attitude. And I got to be the bigger man. Ask me why I am vexed!!! I don't know why. Partly its because of Bravo Echo Golf and partly because I am trying to be the best that I can be. I am surprised I got 31 for econs when I was totally shagged that test day. I drank 2 large cups of caffeine and it still didn't work. I was doing the exam like a man without his heart. But I scrapped. And my confidence is up a little bit. Remember Greg, chin up always. Noone can take Greg away from you. You define Greg. And please people. I'm just ranting. I will be fine. I have been sleeping properly. Probably that has led to my crappiness a little bit. But I'm fine. Never say that I am a quitter. My father was actually telling me about my o level days.I think he was trying to bring back so of the Greg tradition from way back. I think that works but not today Dad. I will call upon this tradition when I need it. Thanks for reminding me though. We all love Greg!! Or at least I know I do. I don't remember where I heard this from but a great man is one who looks at his strengths only and never looks at his weakness, cause if he does, he will live in desperate.

6th gear

I should be doing my readings but oh well what the heck right. I got 2 assignments due in weeks to come. But I'm here to make a point that I wanted to make a long time ago. I long wanted to say a man is judged by his actions. Well judging by my standards I'm not much of a man anyways. I think my father's decision to keep me grounded here is right. Chris da jie words of wisdom is true also. I'm just not emotionally strong now to be overseas by myself. I see the point ya. However, I do feel the test of a man is not judged through good times but through tough times. I haven't been through that though. As most of friends could testify, I'm still as lame as ever. That is true. I won't take that away. It's the image I been showing of myself to others.Nevertheless, that is partly because I don't really like to show my problems to others. I have a dozen of those and noone knows except me. I don't usually share but if I do want, I would. Why you must ask. Well, its partly because of my belief that we should not pour our problems to others. If i die someday and its because of heart disease I will know why. It's because I don't share. All I want now is that at my funeral, someone will say' "This was the epitome of a great man. A man of many unnecessary words but when the time comes he dished out words of wisdom." I always and still feel of myself that way. I can advice people and tell them what needs to be done. I think I'm strong in my beliefs in certain areas like education and the values of life. Not that I like to see streams of people coming to me, but its just that I like to be asked of my opinions. Recently, my friend was really worried about the econs mid term. I think it was largely because of the fact that they all want their cap of 5. I told him"Look bro, we know where we come from, and the fact that we are here is already a miracle.We are seriously competing with the cream of the crop. The elite of Singapore and overseas. We should aim to get our 3.5 first before anything. Do that and if we get anything above a B, we would be leading a happier life. That was my philosophy in NUS anyways." I feel and still feel that I am inferior in certain ways. To be in Dean's list all 8 sems is a thing I can only dream of. I think I have the skills needed to survive in NUS but not to do well. I met an old friend Tuesday. Had a chat with her. She told me she thinks I lost my flame. The old Greg she knows is gone. Well, its probably the glitter in my eyes. The old confidence and sweet arrogance I used to possess is all gone. Am I worried? Nah. Its just a phase. People around me don't know and can't see cause I have been putting up a freaking front but it's ok. The old Greg is and forever will remain in my heart. I hate it when people tell me to mature. I am mature just that I don't show it cause I don't see the need. And I'm personally telling this to Weni here. Don't judge me when you ain't see the fighter I am inside and how I take pride in the fact that I am now in NUS. I fought to get here. Did you guys see me cry when I almost could not make it here. Mr Goh, my primary school tutor, told me I am not as competitive as my siblings. It is not that I am not competitive, and I swear I am, but it is just like I said it I don't put it on my face. Secretly I also want to be on Dean's list. Secretly I want my CAP to be 5. Is that possible? No. It does not harming trying though. Just like Larry, I still believe that with my brains, that is nothing I can't do in the classroom. Just that I don't like it when it gets too technically la. That should be enough ranting for today. Guys, no hard feelings alright. Remember guys, the difference between a loser and a winner is that a winner can find a 6th gear.

the 'Jason Williams' issue

Jason Williams retired towards the end of last month. That was one of the darkest days of my life. Jason was one of the few players I was planning to watch this season. Though he was about to don on a new jersey but he was a key inspiration for yours truly. I was so waiting for December when the papers finally ended so that I could finally sit down every Friday and Saturday morning to watch whatever games they threw at me. I was really hoping to see the new Clippers team la. But of course this season, I would be putting all my money on the 76ers to go post season and I am really hoping for them to go past the first round la. Anyways, Jason Williams was one the rare points that I could honestly say that I grew up with up. I watched him in his Kings days til he finally won his first and only title( I think!!) with Miami. He was not the atypical point I would say. He had his own favour and he played his game his own way so that was the reason I really admired him. He was really flash in the beginning as you can see in the nike ads and stuff but he toned down and I think he really matured towards the end of his decade long career. He was not the elite point with the spotlight on points like Kidd, Arenas, Nash and Williams(Jazz player and not him), but he was always a weapon and got carry a team on his shoulders when need be. Just look at him in the Grizzles days la. He was the floor leader. Hmm the greatest moment I remembered of him was one of the grizzles games la when he was supposed to throw a lob from out of bounds which ended up to be a 3 point shot la. It was like he just shrugged and I was like 'what the'. Anyways, Jason I wish you all the best in whatever endeavors you choose to do. You will really be missed somehow someway and you will have a place here. You probably don;t have a place in my all nba team but you are are always a legend to me. Many thanks fotr the memories. Jason Williams career-rip!